Saturday, 31 October 2009

Blogging again

Apologies for the long radio silence. I'm moving house... so although I now feel that there are things I want to blog about again and that might be worth someone else reading (though only 'might'), I may not have much time.

But I thought I should draw this to the attention of anyone who might still be listening...

As much as I harbour doubts about Guantanamo, we in the West are in a fight with an enemy that knows no boundaries to what it will do to destroy us and our freedoms. A real challenge to anyone who is a liberal (and by that, I mean liberal rather than socialist - Sunny Hoondal take note) - do we stick rigidly to our principles, or compromise ourselves (and perhaps sacifice others' lives as a result)? I don't think the answer to this one is easy...

Oh dear, did I mispell his name? Drat! ;-)

Monday, 13 April 2009

Of McBride & Other Morons...

Mrs Brennan is studying Eugenics at the moment. Fascinating stuff - and it made me aware of the cultural influence against Eugenics to which I have been subjected. My immediate reaction was along the lines of, 'Hitler was into that, it's been associated with racism....'. And nerds like me have, of course, seen Gattaca, which was quite scary - because genes are only part of the story, and can never be used to predict what a person is.

Except intelligence is highly genetic... and, in practice, a combination of genetically-inherited idiocy and an upbringing by parental idiots seems to be a strong predictor of who provides the 'entertainment' for the police on a Friday and Saturday night...

Anyway... It turns out that 'moron', 'imbecile' and 'idiot' are technical terms, with specific meanings attached to each:

An idiot has an IQ of 0-25.
An imbecile has an IQ of 26-50.
Whilst a moron has an IQ of 51-75 (though some say up to 80). Apparently, these were considered the most dangerous, as they were more likely than idiots and imbeciles to reproduce, and thus damage the gene pool (see Inspector Gadget blog - including the link above - to see the results of state-sponsorship for morons...).

Well, the events of this joyous Easter weekend got me thinking about how we might modernise these terms, which have simply, of course, become random terms of abuse today...

A 'Draper' could be used instead of 'idiot' - quite simply because everyone can see that this is exactly what he is.
A 'McBride' could be an 'imbecile' - because he's not quite so obviously stupid, until, that is, he uses a No.10 computer / internet link to send defamatory emails to fellow McBrides and Drapers.
And a 'Toynbee' could be used as the modern term for 'moron' - because Toynbees are the most dangerous, getting widespread coverage on the BBC and in moronic 'newspapers' for her equally moronic views, and therefore risking severe mental damage to the wider population.

Saturday, 4 April 2009

Australian PM Rudd takes lead in new fiscal stimulus

Following this week's G20 meeting, Australian PM Kevin Rudd has already shown his willingness to follow Gordon Brown's lead in stimulating the economy by throwing mobile phones and other objects at his staff, requiring the purchase of their replacement, thereby providing a much-needed demand boost to the economy.

Mr Rudd's new spokesman, Alastair Campbell, pointed out that, 'Throwing items such as mobile phones and chairs at civil servants is just Kevin's way of joking around. And even if they did require counselling afterwards, that will also help stimulate the economy.

'If you report anything other than this official line, you'll end up like David Kelly.'

Reports from ex-staffers that Mr Rudd's behaviour could be explained by the fact that he had caught a rare virus from Mr Brown - who has exhibited behaviours similar to those of Mr Rudd, including telephoning officials at all times of the night and having violent temper tantrums, as well as throwing objects at people - known as socialistus mentalis psycho-sociopathus (SMPS) were dismissed by Mr Campbell, who pointed out that, 'I'm a pretty sane kind of guy, and I'm sure I would have noticed any abnormal behaviour on the part of Kevin, or, indeed, Gordon, who is, of course, one of my closest friends.'

Denying reports that he had deliberately passed on the SMPS virus to Mr Rudd, Gordon Brown said, 'We announced at the G20 that we would launch a fiscal stimulus, and Kevin Rudd is doing just that. The fact that Kevin Rudd is following the lead taken by the Labour Government in Great Britain just goes to show how far the do-nothing-Tories are outside the consensus of world opinion in dealing with the downturn.

'With the leaders of all G20 countries following my lead and breaking mobile phones, computer keyboards and chairs at least once a day, we will soon reach the $1.1 trillion stimulus promised in London on Thursday.'

Shares of Nokia, Motorola and LG rose sharply in trading today, following Mr Brown's comments.

Medical note: The SMPS virus

The SMPS virus is normally transmitted sexually, usually through unprotected anal intercourse. However, it can also (rarely) be transmitted via contaminated toilet seats. Mr Rudd is known to partake of an unusual practice, known as 'driving the porcelain bus' on occasions, usually after eating food at sporting events. It is possible he could have caught the SMPS virus after sharing a bathroom with Mr Brown at the G20 event.

Wednesday, 1 April 2009

NHS to offer new 'Polly Pill'

Prime Minister Gordon Brown announced today that the new Polly Pill, revealed 'exclusively' on the Al-Jabeeba website this week, will be made available immediately on the NHS, on a compulsory basis, to all voters citizens, despite concerns about side-effects.

The Chancellor One-eyed Scottish cunt Prime Minister said, 'Ve have been looking for vays of making you pork, I mean, we have been looking for ways to neutralise opposition and ensure the re-election of a National Socialist Labour government, and this is perfect. It will not benefit hard-working families throughout the Socialist Republic of Scotland the UK.

Named after legendary Guardian columnist Polly Toynbee, once the new Polly Pill has been taken, the patient immediately begins to spout left-wing bollocks reasonable, 'liberal' views, and will immediately believe everything that Gordon Brown says, including the delusion obvious point that he is the Saviour of the World, John the Baptist to Barack Obama's Jesus.

Concerns about side-effects - including allegations of the development of SHS (Severe Hypocrisy Syndrome), usually involving earning large sums of money for writing bollocks whilst pretending to represent 'the poor', and taking regular flights to a second home abroad whilst condemning those who fly abroad for their one holiday a year for causing global warming - have been dismissed by those close to the Prime Minister, who point out that the Polly Pill is believed to reduce the incidence of Conservative voting by as much as 50%, and that, therefore, the benefits hugely outweigh any risks.

Saturday, 28 March 2009

Oscar the Grouch

Because one of the posters on BoingBoing (see my previous post) had referenced Oscar the Grouch, I Googled him. And found this, courtesy of nufo42 on YouTube...

Well, it made me laugh...

Now if only all welfare twats that mooch off others could 'get no pussy', then the world would be a much better place...

Anti-Terror Billboard

Apologies for the lack of posts lately - life has been somewhat hectic as of late.

Hopefully will have time to post later today or tomorrow. In the meantime, courtesy of Dungeekin and James Holden, I've made my own version of the latest scary adverts put out by what purports to be a 'democratic' Government.

Some wonderful examples on BoingBoing - LOL.

Sunday, 8 March 2009

Labour MP says something sensible!

And it isn't Frank Field!

Having slated the Mail, I now have to praise it for publishing this article by Tom Harris, in which he argues that Labour need to tackle the culture of welfare dependency.

I know the Mail often spouts bollocks, but this is worth a read. In particular, he acknowledges that Tosser Blair fired Frank Field for 'thinking the unthinkable [but sensible]'. Perhaps another mea culpa for Blair to acknowledge, in addition to his admission that Labour got lucky on the economy (i.e. unlike Brown's 'scorched earth' policy, Ken Clark actually gave a shit about our standard of living - even if he's a cunt who wants the UK to be run from Brussels)...

I don't expect Cameron to sort out the economy; nor do I expect him to do what's needed with the welfare state (and that includes education and the NHS). But part of me - foolishly, I know - hopes that I'm wrong.

We need another Thatcher. Who will stand up and be counted?

More bollocks from the Daily Mail

All right, it's not a surprise that the Mail is talking bollocks.

But this story on Alzheimer's drugs is Ed Balls of the highest order.

A study involving 26 people does not constitute scientific proof, you numbskulls!

Get some fucking lessons in basic statistics before you print such a load of crap, and try to get taxpayers to pay for useless drugs. Cunts.

Or are you being paid by the manufacturers?

Life to be banned - 'too dangerous', says Minister

Following new scientific research from the University of the North of New Britain (formerly Kilbride College of FE), which shows for the first time that all human beings will die eventually, Safety Minister Jim Fitzpatrick has announced that all human life will be banned 'in the interests of improving statistics', which will, in turn, ensure 'New' Labour's prospects in all future elections.

Speaking exclusively on the Andrew Brown-Nose show, Mr Fitzpatrick explained, 'We have not been able to find any other way to catch up with Swedish and Dutch immortality statistics. We therefore took this tough decision - over breakfast this morning when we were deciding what new initiative we could announce on your show.'

The Brown Broadcasting Corporation could not be arsed to ask any spokesmen from other parties to comment on the proposals. Defending this decision, BBC Political Director Chris Paul said, 'This is such a minor administrative decision that we felt that it did not impinge on our Charter requirement to defend socialism.'

'In any case, when the Tories killed everyone in the North in the 1980s, Labour were not given the chance to put their case for increasing income taxes on the south to 110% in order to fund the north's basic requirements for chips, gravy, shellsuits, bling and BMWs.'

The Liberal Social Democrat spokesperson for public health, Sheila Beardsandal, said, 'This is ridiculous. Only today, our Conference voted through a radical suggestion to increase life expectancy by funding an expedition to find the Fountain of Youth. And yet the BBC - yet again - found no time to allow us to put forward this practical proposal on a minor TV show that nobody watches.'

Saturday, 7 March 2009

Review of the Week

Dear Reader,

Well, it's been an exciting, Progressive week, hasn't it?

First, that well-known hero of Women's Rights, Teddy Kennedy, has been given a life peerage - as Prime Minister Gordon Brown so eloquently explained, 'After all, if Lord Ashcroft can be a peer, why not an American who share's New Labour's values*?' Lord Kennedy of Chappaquiddick will take up his seat immediately.

Second, following the disgraceful treatment of Lord Ahmed of Tub, his supporters have received assurances from the Secretary of State for Sharia Law and Justice, Abdullah Islam (formerly Jack Straw), that Muslims will only be tried by fellow Muslims, that the word of a non-Muslim will be valued at less than that of a Muslim in future court cases, and that the Muslim Parliament will henceforth be given a right to pass new legislation without clearance by the House of Commons and the House of Lords, as well as a veto on any new laws emenating from those institutions.

Mr Islam (Straw) pointed out that, 'We in Britain have a long track record** of capitulating to, I mean protecting Minorities, and this new step demonstrates just how progressive we are. I, for one, welcome our new Islamic overlords.' Osama Bin Laden, speaking from his Islamic (formerly Royal) Air Force jet en route from Pakistan to take up his new position as Speaker / Leader of the Muslim Parliament and Supreme Ruler of the United Caliphate (formerly United Kingdom), said, 'I welcome the recognition of the rightness of my Cause from my brothers in the United Caliphate Labour Party. Allah willing, I will be taking it up the arse from Peter Mandelson this very evening, I mean, I'm not a closet homosexual at all, I will be receiving a delegation led by Peter Mandelson later this evening. I have ordered an immediate nuclear strike on Denmark and the Netherlands, for the disgraceful actions of their cartoonists and Geert Wilders respectively.' The Supreme Leader also welcomed the appointment of Lord Kennedy to the House of Lords, saying, 'He shares my attitude towards - and valuation of - women'.

The third great triumph of the week, following the disgraceful and outrageous attack on Peter Mandelson (now known as Nancia Marrakecha) on Friday, was the back passage of emergency legislation to allow for the summary execution, without trial and on the orders of a Minister or ACPO, of anyone who embarrasses important government figures, whether they be officials from the Office of National Statistics, or so-called 'environmentalists' (who could be greener than our New Labour Government?!) who throw things at Ministers. Announcing the latest law, newly Burqua'ed Home Secretary, Islama Fascista (formerly Jacqui Smith) said, 'We will be tough on slime, tough on the causes of slime'.

All Hail the Masters of the United Caliphate of Great Britain and Northern Ireland! All Hail Allah and his Prophet Mohammed!
All Hail his servants, Lord Ahmed of Tub, Lord Kennedy of Chappaquiddick, Abdullah Islam / Jack Straw and Islama Fascista / Jacqui Smith!

*No, that does not mean corruption, John Prescott levels of gluttony, and 'all animals are equal, but some are more equal than others'. Anyone suggesting this will receive a friendly visit from a delegation of 10,000 of Lord Ahmed's closest friends.

** i.e. about 11 years

Sunday, 1 March 2009


Old Holborn has drawn this fat bitch to my attention.

This isn't the first time I've heard a black person refer to another as a 'coconut' - it's usually reserved for people who aspire to middle-class things, like a house in a good area, a good education for their kids, etc.

Demonstrating ignorance beyond belief.

Well, OH's respondents have said most of it. But I would draw out 2 points:

- Why is it acceptable for black people to be racist - attacking values, etc. that are apparently 'white'? Why the double standards? Anyone? Draper? Harperson? Our friends at the BBC?
- I thought national politicians were stupid, but this one takes the biscuit. How do we devolve powers to local government with this shower of shite in line to wield them?

The New Zimbabwe?

As Zimbabwe goes further down the toilet, thanks to the support for Robert Mugabe provided by the South African government and British banks, a new Zimbabwe appears to be rising, or, rather, sinking - the 'People's Democratic Republic of Venezuela'.

Fresh from appointing himself President for Life (not that he was ever going to give up power, of course), Hugo 'Wanker doesn't begin to describe him' Chavez now seems to be nationalising food production.

Like that never leads to food shortages...

The people of Venezuela have my sympathies - first, they suffered under the rule of a self-interested, crooked 'elite', and now the man that claimed he would 'save' them is making things worse [This seems to remind me of someone else who claims to be a saviour, but the name somehow escapes me...].

And, to top it all, they've had to put up with visits and support from Ken 'Cronyism isn't my middle name, because I'm a cheeky chappie' Livingslime. Who, together with the usual bunch of Guardianista gobshites, thinks everything in Venezuela is hunky-dory.

When Venezuela collapses, will Ken admit he got it wrong? Or will he be like the (inexplicably popular) twat and hypocrite-par-excellence landowner, Tony Wedgewood-Benn, and claim that he was never wrong about anything? Sadly, I know where my money is...

Fuck, I hate socialists. They destroy anything that's good in life and accentuate everything that's bad. And then they claim to represent the 'workers', whilst they live in luxury hotels and dine in the finest restaurants. Or pay their wives £100k a year salaries, eh Ken?

Just like 1984 - how come Orwell remained a socialist when he could see what they inevitably become?

Wanker of the Week

Is the improbably named 'James T Kirk', for the following comment on the BBC News' Have Your Say:

"In their 2005 manifesto New labour promised a referendum on whether or not to sign the Lisbon treaty."

No, it was on the EU constitution, not the Lisbon Treaty. Irrespective of that, Blair did that to ensure the French held a referendum which he believed (rightly) would reject the Constitution and enable Britain and other countries to renegotiate some of the more ambitious aspects and gain more opt outs. This was achieved with the result that Lisbon really is just a tidying up exercise.

Well, as much as I like Star Trek (alright, alright, stop sniggering at the back... :-), this 'James T Kirk' is an utter wanker. I mean, does anyone seriously buy this shit? Gordon 'Courage' Brown didn't hold a referendum because he was scared that he would lose. As the Meerkat says, 'Simples'...

Meanwhile, most (though not all) of those making comments show their general ignorance by attacking Free Trade. My favourite is this:

We need a bit of both [Free Trade and Protectionism!]. Exporting comes from reciprocity [NB A protectionist concept, much favoured by the French...], and we need to keep key domestic skills safe.

BUT the net result should be that we export a little more than we import.

Eventually that WILL solve our economic woes.

You just can't be a net importer and fund it by we have seen.

Gordon-Charisma Brown, Brownutopia, Republic of Tax, Spend and Waste.

As much as this person has obviously picked out Gordon the Moron's, ahem, 'qualities', the statement does suggest one slight mathematical problem: how can all countries export a little more than they import?!!! That means that we can't all follow this policy, which makes it unsustainable... that way lies the 1930s Depression, to which protectionism made no little contribution.

What these muppets need to get is some basic economics (and history) lessons:

- Some countries import more than they export. This deficit can be funded in a number of ways: borrowing, a transfer / sale of assets abroad / etc.

- This is not a problem! It's a good thing!

- If a country can no longer afford - or is perceived as no longer being able to afford - to do this, its currency tends to depreciate against those of others. This makes its imports more expensive, and its exports cheaper, allowing it to reduce / eliminate its trade deficit. [For the benefit of the likes of Mr Kirk, this is one reason why joining the Euro is a really dumb idea - just look at its impact on Italy, for example...]

- This is a natural part of the economic cycle... like recessions. You can't 'cure' a recession, as idiots like Brown seem to think. Of course, you can make them worse, by entering them with a structural fiscal deficit, built up during a boom... But who would be stupid enough to do something like that?!

Wednesday, 25 February 2009

Lord Ahmed the Cunt

Well, I can't believe it.

Lord Ahmed got six weeks (after parole) in a cushy four star hotel prison.

It's outrageous! I expected him to get a fully suspended sentence. After all, he's a Labour Lord - and a Muslim! They're not subject to English law - especially when it's just a white man they've killed.

Still, at least his cunt, arsehole, dhimmi wanker, gobshite, turd of the highest order lawyer has appealed against this outrageously long sentence.

I mean, they can 'prove' that his use of a cellphone had nothing to do with the crash. I don't know how, but I believe Lord Ahmed over anyone else. Actually, it's obvious that the texting had nothing to do with the crash. After all, if you're driving at 60mph, you could never see far enough ahead on a straight road in order to stop in time. [Note to Lord A: I take it I now won't be getting a visit from 10,000 of your friends? Cheers! I mean, thanks - no, I don't drink, I mean that isn't allowed anymore.]

I hope that family members of the judge in question die in similar circumstances. Let's see if he then considers a 6 week sentence to represent 'justice'. Cunt.

Until we elect district attorneys in this country and set tougher minimum sentences, we will never get rid of the bleeding heart, Guardian-reading cunts who are responsible for this kind of nonsense.

Is it just me...

This story in today's Guardian (no, I don't normally read it: the Devil linked to a different story and I saw the headline) has opened my eyes to a bizarre 'pastime', called 'Upskirting'. This apparently involves the illicit taking of photographs up the skirts of oblivious females...

What the fuck?!

Just how low can people sink? I thought we'd reached a nadir with Big Brother and Benicio del Toro's 'Che', but...

One view might be that the legalisation of prostitution can't come soon enough. Another - that these men are too cowardly (or too small down there) to ever try to have sex with a woman, even if they were paying for it...

However, it does have the upside of getting Guardian readers all in a tizz - the comments are well worth reading, if only to see the stupidity of that particular group... And the Islamist tossers who suggest that 'women should dress appropriately'. Which takes me back to the Devil's post about how 30% of the population still, apparently, plan to vote Labour.

Lord help us.

Saturday, 21 February 2009

Letter to the Stasi

Dear Jacqui,

Forgive me for writing to you twice - I felt that it was important to write to you at both of your addresses, as it is not clear to me which is your main residence.

Following the recent decision to bar Geert Wilders from the UK, I felt it necessary to warn you of the risks of creating disturbances in other communities of certain Government actions. Clearly, on receipt of this information, you will feel compelled to act, as you have done following Lord Ahmed's intervention in the Wilders case.

First, any decision to allow any Muslim preacher into the UK will result in a delegation of at least 10,000 Christians, Hindus, Jews, agnostics, atheists and Jedi marching on whichever of your addresses you are at at the time. I therefore respectfully request that you do not allow any Muslim preachers into the UK.

Second, any decision of Gordon Brown not to resign and call an immediate election will result in the same delegation marching on Downing St. Again, I therefore respectfully suggest that the Prime Mentalist resign forthwith, with a general election to follow immediately.

Third, any decision not to tell the European Court of Human 'Rights' to go forth and multiply over the case of Abu Qatada, and a failure to deport him immediately will result in the same delegation marching on the prison where he is being held and holding an impromptu hanging, with similar sized delegations (for similar purposes) marching on the Home Office and both of your residences.

Fourth, failure to prosecute members of the Labour Party for outright fraud (most notably yourself, the Cooper-Balls household, Ken Livingstone, Lee Jasper, members of the House of Lords who have been taking bribes in return for amending laws - in fact, the list seems to be endless) will result in a similar delegation marching on Parliament.

Yours faithfully,

Bishop Brennan

PS I have just been told that the right to march on Parliament and break the law is one that is reserved solely for Muslims, with additional rights reserved for those who have killed someone by reading / sending text messages whilst driving. Apologies for my error in believing that all UK citizens were equal before the law.

Post of the year - two contenders

By Dungeekin, via Old Holborn.

And some pretty good comments too (apart from all the twats going on about bad taste - like selling the rights to your death is in good taste!).

And another contender from the same site, this time by Leg-Iron. Another one for the tossers at 'Liberal' Conspiracy to ponder.

Love him or hate him, Old Holborn - and his crew - has become required reading...

Tuesday, 17 February 2009

Compare and contrast... my declaration of freedom

Man attacks drug dealer who won't stop selling heroin to members of his family. Gets two months in prison, for what is effectively a minor assault on someone who deserved it - and who won't be punished by the police, CPS or any of the other cunts who supposedly provide 'justice' in what is laughably called our 'criminal justice system'. The Penguin's commentary on Old Holborn's blog says it all.

A lorry driver who killed a family of 6 people (crushed between 2 lorries so that their bodies were not recognisable) on a straight road where there is no good reason for him not to stop (no bad weather, etc.) gets 3 years in prison, which will be 18 months in reality. The family were not criminals and had done nothing wrong. The lorry driver simply couldn't be arsed to concentrate on the road. Hope the cunt dies of cancer.

Lord Ahmed is the Labour peer who successfully threatened - with total impunity - to bring 10,000 Muslims to the Horse of Lords to prevent a Dutch MP, Geert Wilders, from showing a film which depicts the violent nature of Islamists. Strangely enough, he didn't show any religious concern for the lives of others when he was sending a text message whilst driving on the motorway, and killed a man. He will get a maximum of 2 years in prison, i.e. 1 year after parole - and, of course, because he's a Labour peer and a Muslim to boot (better if he were gay and disabled, although, given Derek Draper's comments, only a non-'windowlicker' disability...), I guess he will get a suspended sentence. The fat, stupid, terrorist-loving cunt.

And people wonder why increasing numbers of us have no confidence in our 'justice' system?!

Well, I announce today that I am renouncing the protection of this so-called system of 'justice'. As is my right, I will defend my family using whatever measures are necessary. I do not recognise the authority of the police or any court in the UK. Any action taken against me by those authorities is illegitimate and an abuse of my fundamental rights of self-determination and self-defence.

Monday, 16 February 2009

Nutter on the bus...

'Fuckin kids, nah fuckin respect these days. Me, I got a dodgy knee, and that scum we've brought into the world won't give me a seat. Kids these days - they're just scum. Just stabbing kids, no good for anyfink. Going into hospital tomorruh, only waiting til tomorruh so I can get my pension. And they won't give me a seat'

Says the nutter to his reflection in the window, as he climbs up onto the top deck of the thing they call a bus here in Chav-ville.

So far, not a lot to disagree with.

'Can't believe the mess this country's in. We're going to the bloody dogs.'

How true.

'It's all the fault of that one-eyed Scotch cunt. He should go back to fuckin' Scotland. He's finished, finished.'

If only. If only.

'Let the banks fail. Why the fuck should bloody taxpayers bail out the fucking banks? Somefink else would've evolved to take their place.'

True, how true.

'This place is full of bloody Europeans, half of 'em don't even speak fuckin' English.'

Mmmmm. Well, I don't hold it against you.

'All that cunt Gordon Brown's fault. He's let 'em in.'

Fair point. But they (and the, ahem, people of colour you don't appear to like very much) are, for the most part, a damn sight more useful than the native inhabitants of Chav-ville. Perhaps we could send the chavs to their countries?

'But I won't vote for the bleedin' Tories, me. No way.'

Well, it's true that they won't be much better (not that they could be any worse, of course).

'Nah, the answer's National Socialism', he emphasises, 'National Socialism'.

Oh dear.... and I thought we might be friends. Well, alright, maybe not... but I did at least feel sorry for you.

'Yer, vote BNP. Vote BNP, that's what I'm gonna do. This country's goin' to the dogs.'

How instructive for the twats at Liberal Conspiracy, who keep trying to claim that National Socialism had nothing to do with socialism. Clearly, not something that all of their fellow 'liberals' share... Something for them to ponder - if only they dared read anything outside their own comfort zone...

Sunday, 15 February 2009

Modern English usage, part viii (cont)

The Derek Draper nonsense this week has reminded me of just how, ahem, 'far' the language of Milton and Shakespeare has come in just 11 years of the Moron, Harperson, et al.

Anyway, I thought it might be important to start to record these momentous changes for posterity:

'Racist' - Anyone who disagrees with a socialist.

'Liberal' - A socialist, usually self-important, with the Guardian rolled up and stuffed up her ass (NB note the avoidance of any assumption that the Liberal is male).

'A good service' - The usual crappy level of service offered by the London Undergroud.

'Hard-working families' - Chavs who vote Labour (assuming they are allowed to vote; sadly, many 13-15 year olds are disenfranchised, something that the Party must sort out as soon as possible). Usually used to support the idea that anyone who is single cannot possibly work hard, and therefore must pay what used to be regarded (laughably, of course) as penal levels of taxation.

'White, anglo-saxon male' - repressor; bastard; value-less, someone that a Muslim (qv) may kill without punishment.

'White, anglo-saxon female' - object of the repression and bastardry meted out by the white anglo-saxon male (qv). Nonetheless, may be used for the sexual gratification of a Muslim without punishment.

'Tory' - Evil, must be stopped from gaining power at all costs, even if it means abandoning any pretence at democracy in the UK.

'School' - place where children from poor backgrounds must be pandered to at all costs, as part of the wider reach of the State. Anyone who suggests that school should be a place of learning a) has clearly not been near one in 20 years, and b) should be locked up, given their potential to harm themselves and Society (NB there is such a thing as Society, and it can be personalised, so can think, feel, be harmed, etc.).

'Social worker' - a state employee who should be given even more power, despite all the evidence that they should have very limited powers (Baby Peter, etc.).

'Muslim' - a member of society who has more rights than other people, including the right not to be offended; should this right be breached, Muslims have the right to call for the death of the person causing the offence, to blockade Parliament and, ultimately, to take over the country.

'The NHS' - the official religion of the UK, the only thing held in higher esteem than Islam. No-one may criticise the NHS or suggest that it is a waste of money; punishment is to be told that 'you obviously support the US health system, where 40m people don't have any healthcare, you eeeeeevil Tory (qv), you'. And to be sent to a re-education camp.

'Politician' - cunt (common usage, punishable by death); a selfless public servant, provided that they are a liberal (qv). If a Tory, then common usage applies (without threat of death).

'MP' - person entitled to enrich themselves at the expense of taxpayers; not to be held to account for any expense claims or to have applied to them standards that are usual for mere mortals.

'Minister' - like MP, except even less accountable. Not to be questioned under any circumstances.

'America' - the source of all things bad. Though no longer, now that George W Bush has departed, to be replaced by Barack Obama (qv).

'Depression' - a word that the Prime Minister only ever uses by accident.

'Barack Obama' - the Messiah, who will save us all, banish poverty, solve the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, bring world peace and usher in a Golden Age, the like of which has never been seen before.

'Gordon Brown' - the Messiah, who has already saved the world; John the Baptist to Obama's Jesus.

'Courage' - disappearing whenever a problem arises; blaming others when this is not possible.

'Tony Blair' - formerly thought to be the Messiah, now shown to simply have been 'a very naughty boy'.

'Grammar' - a device used by the eeeevil middle- and upper-classes to repress the working masses; used to describe schools which took the brightest working class children and co-opted them into the System.

'Politically impartial' - Allowed to occasionally criticise the Labour Party, provided this is counter-balanced by a worse example on the part of the Tories (qv).

'Criminal' - Any member of the middle classes who drives above the speed limit. No longer applies to anyone who was brought up by a single parent / in a 'low-income' (qv) family / from an ethnic minority / etc. who commits murder / rape / theft / etc. They cannot be criminals because it is not their fault that they do these things, but the fault of the System.

'Low-income' - anyone whose income is less than £100,000 a year, unless they come from a middle-class family with two heterosexual parents who love each other.

I'm sure you have many more - perhaps we ought to start a New New Labour dictionary website?

And it begins to sink in...

just how far Labour have fucked us...

Will the last non-chav turn out the lights on their way out, please?

What will all the benefit scum do when we've left them behind? :-)

Saturday, 14 February 2009

Wanker of the Week

Back by popular demand...

And today's wanker is... Derek Draper.

Primarily for this post. Presumably, 'revenge' for Guido pointing out that he didn't go to Berkeley (even though it would have been an appropriate place for him...).

Derek - fuck off you tedious, totalitarian cunt. None of the comments you cite are racist - they simply reflect reality in Brown's Britain. But, of course, socialists have always shouted, 'Racist!' at anyone with whom they disagree.

But racist comments like 'British jobs for British workers' are, of course, OK if they are uttered by socialist cunts like Gordon the Moron.

Anyway, given that Guido has apparently deleted the non-racist comments, I'm more than happy for any reader to leave similar ones on this blog. As a reminder, this is the picture:

And, Derek, keep your totalitarian shit on LabourShite - there's no room for it in the rest of the blogosphere.

Honestly, you'd think he had better things to worry about, like his mental boss, who's taking the country down the toilet - or just shagging his wife (after all, we all know the risks of not keeping your spouse happy in bed...).

Monday, 9 February 2009

Comment of the week - April 2008...

Dear Reader,

Apologies for the non-existent blogging - the Angel of Pestilence has been visiting the Brennan household. Only my hamster died, so it's not so bad (although R****** G*** is a bit upset, especially as F****** S*** ate it...).

Anyway, gave me a chance to visit an old friend, aka the Beast. Although he hasn't posted recently (other than on Guido's comments, I was revisiting a classic sick / funny post about the disabled. Personally, I think it's a sign of civilisation when we support the disabled to be productive members of society. But I have to agree with Leg-Iron for this comment, which I think is self-explanatory - and deserves a wider airing:

Most of the disabled are only helpless because people tell them they're helpless. There is a big difference, never stated because it's not PC, between 'disabled' and 'useless'.

To any of those who say 'Oh, I'm disabled, you must feel sorry for me and look after me for the rest of my days because I'm unable to do anything for myself', I have one name to drop.

Stephen Hawking.

He's the most severely disabled person I've ever seen, and he's also the most brilliant scientist in the country. No benefit-scrounging for this guy, he makes all the money he needs through his own efforts.

If you're happy to sit back and live off benefits for the rest of your life, it's not because you're disabled.

It's because you're useless. Wallowing in self-pity is not a viable career choice.

I blame the PC crowd. They love to make people feel dependent. Gives them a steady stream of saps to partonise.

His posts on Old Holborn aren't bad either...

Monday, 2 February 2009

Ride the buses...

Well, I would if they could cope with a bit of snow...

Anyway, I'm bored, being stuck at home and all, and DK has found a bus slogan generator... As my mind is always in the sewer, I came up with this...

Ridicule is always mightier than the sword...

Sunday, 1 February 2009

The rise of the pleblic*

*Term coined by The Filthy Smoker, commenting on Devil's Kitchen.

Well, the signs have been there for some time... England's white, 'working' classes are rising up in support of 'British jobs for British workers'.

And, whilst Mandy Pandy tries to stand up for Free Trade and against protectionism (as, to be fair, he did in Brussels, pissing off the French - well, the man can't be all bad!), the reality is that it is his party, the Prime Mentalist that he is supporting, the economic policy which he has supported all along, the EU policy which he has helped implement as well as supported, the adoption of an effective open border policy to immigrants and the rejection of policies to reduce the power of trade unions that are responsible for the rising tide of union action that we're seeing now.

Frank Field - one of the few Labour MPs that I have any time for - writes today about the consequences of the open doors policy in particular - and the stupidity of the 'British jobs for British workers' soundbite that the Great Gobshite in Downing St used a few months ago. Whilst the article is flawed - not least in its call for Splash Gordon to actually adopt a position of British jobs for British workers - it shows the sheer alarm in the Labour Party about the loss of their core supporters and the concommitant rise of the BNP - Labour voters are switching to them, illustrating that they are a left-wing party, not a right-wing one, no matter what idiots on Liberal Conspiracy try to claim...

But is it the 'white, working class' who should be angry - or those of us who have seen our taxes pissed down the toilet (strange and incongruous, I know, given this week's stories that suggest that Gordo can't actually manage to get to the toilet...) by this useless, ideologically-driven Government? Note - they're not just incompetent. They are deliberately fucking our country up.

One example: schools. Because they can't even get schools to teach our kids to read, write and count, they've given up. Instead, schools are to become a core part of 'children's services' policies to tackle 'inequality' - not, as Grammar schools used to, by teaching them useful skills and knowledge, but by telling them that it's not their fault if they don't learn... even if it's because they're fucking lazy bastards. Don't believe me? Have a look at 21st Century Schools: A World-Class Education for Every Child / A School Report Card. It simply beggars belief.

And some people actually thought Brown would be better than Blair. Although, to be fair (and to borrow a phrase), this isn't Brown, it's Balls.

Not enough for you? How about this from Thursday's Times:

There have been intense discussions on Labour’s National Executive Committee about how to help the 4.5 million people waiting for social housing and to get the construction industry back to work, The Times has learnt.

Now, how the fuck, after a boom lasting 15 years or so, are there 4.5 million people on the waiting list for social housing?! Are there that many useless Brits? Probably... Or is it that we have imported 4.5 million people from Poland, Ukraine, Brazil, Pakistan, Nigeria, etc. - well, they all seem to live near me, in my rapidly-depreciating tiny flat in Chav-ville. But weren't we told that these people were generating an economic benefit? So it 'can't' be them!

And what about our wonderfully generous benefits system - generous, that is, to frauds, cheats, liars and other scumbugs (strange that this also fits the description of most members of Parliament...), but not if you are old and need social care, having paid taxes for others' care throughout your working life. Or you've become unemployed in your 50s, after paying taxes all your working life. Just have a look at Ms Snuffy's, errr, heart-warming modern day story about a benefits scam, albeit one perpetrated by an Indian family, rather than by white trash.

So, I ask. What have the striking twats got to strike about?

- They largely voted for this Government of all the Gobshites - or at least funded it, given their membership of Trade Unions like Unite.
- It is the middle classes that are paying for them and their families. The 'poor' cheat the benefits system and / or don't earn enough, whilst the truly rich can get around paying tax. The sods in the middle get (financially) fisted by Gay Gordon and his merry band of cunts.
- They've priced themselves out of the labour market by demanding wages and benefits (wages in all but name) which are out of kilter with their productivity.

It is people like me, who've been paying for all this shite - and will pay for it in the future (although I can move abroad and escape) - who should be going on strike and protesting in the street. Not BNP-voting muppets who believed that Gordon the Moron was some kind of economic genius...

Saturday, 31 January 2009

One of those irritating but have-to-do quizes...

Via Obnoxio, another one of those annoying quizes...

You are a right social libertarian.
Right: 7.23, Libertarian: 3.68

Apparently, I am a moderate libertarian - but with a neo-con twist :-)

Clearly, my pro-gay marriage, being able to say what you like about any ethnic group, etc. and violent video game but anti-abortion and pro-banging up criminals for life views completely fuck up their American-based 'Culture War' thingy though...

This has probably been debated to death on the interwebby, but what is it that makes someone a libertarian, i.e. what are 'core' libertarian views?

I would say:

- Belief in negative rights - free speech, freedom of association, all equal before the law, etc. This includes proper punishment for those who infringe those rights, not 5 seconds of 'community service'.
- No such thing as 'positive' rights
- Belief in a small state
- Economic liberalism (which might mean regulation when markets fail, provided the government failure isn't even worse)

Clearly, not all would agree with me though:

- The Chicago School libertarians take what is a useful simplification for analytical purposes - that markets work - and make it into dogma. Whereas markets do sometimes fail. What is then important is whether state intervention can make it any better, without imposing massive costs or distortions, and without infringing basic liberties. I think that it can in some cases.
- Some also have some slightly mad (in my view) opinions on returning to the gold standard and the like. I like to think that I'm radical, but... Basically, human psychology means that wages can't easily drop - they're not sufficiently flexible. So we're stuck with some inflation as the price...
- Many libertarians dislike /hate my more interventionist views with regard to foreign policy, e.g. in principle, I support the intervention in Afghanistan, although we're fucking it up somewhat...
- It is very difficult to deal with irrational individuals, particularly Islamists who want to make the UK into an Islamic state, by force - I tend to feel that they should go live in an Islamist country and leave us alone; whereas a classic libertarian would allow them to live here and simply imprison those who commit crimes. My problem with this is that I don't think a rational approach works with people who cannot be appealed to with reason;
- Most libertarians rather idealistically believe in open borders - I don't think this is practical in a world where most countries don't practice this and there are such disparities of wealth.

Still, libertarianism's a broad church... isn't it? :-)

Saturday, 24 January 2009

Next stop for the UK police?

Apparently, some Nigerians think a thief has shape-shifted into a goat, and their local police force has been forced to take it into custody!

[This might explain a lot... After all, Harriet Harperson can't be human - perhaps she's that famous Sudanese goat that was married off to some peasant after he was caught, ahem, engaging in marital relations with it. Might explain her hatred of men and the idea that they might enjoy having sex...

On the other hand, maybe she's just a man-hating lesbian who has been forced into a sham marriage with a 'man' (using the widest definition of 'man' possible, given that it is Jack Dromey we're talking about here...)...]

Anyhooo... it's just so easy to go off-topic when it comes to the utter cunts that 'Govern' our country...

I think the point of raising this - apart from the fact that it's a tad amusing - was that it could never happen here... could it?

Personally, I'm not so sure... with the Government's anti-Darwinian scheme to reduce average intelligence, otherwise known as the 'Welfare State', funded by piling ever more taxes on hard-working individuals (whether they have families or not), whilst the likes of Paul Myners get rich courtesy of the taxpayer (via shorting banks, something which he is now slagging off, the hypocritical cunt) and pay very little tax...

And the outcome? How about this, for starters...

Friday, 23 January 2009

Fake charities

An eagle-eyed reader may have noticed that Devil's Kitchen has launched the website, after yet another 'charity' was revealed to be nothing of the sort, but rather a front for the Government to claim popular support for imposing yet more illiberal legislation on us.

Like the Devil, I am thoroughly pissed-off with this state of affairs - it's bad enough that businesses do this (see, e.g. The Truth About Drug Companies for examples of how Big Pharma uses charities to persuade the sheeple to lobby for ineffective drugs, like Herceptin for early stage breast cancer). But now the illiberal cunts in Government are using the same dirty tricks, cunts that they are.

So I have volunteered to help this noble cause. And I urge you to do the same.

My first contribution: some FoI requests:


Dear Sir / Madam,

I am writing to make a request under the Freedom of Information Act.

I would be grateful if you could let me know which charities received funding from the DCSF and its agencies:

- In 2008; and
- In 2007.

Yours sincerely,

Paul Brennan


Dear Sir / Madam,

I am writing to make a request under the Freedom of Information Act.

I would be grateful if you could let me know which charities received funding from the Department of Health and its agencies:

- In 2008; and
- In 2007.

Yours sincerely,

Paul Brennan



Dear Sir / Madam,

I am writing to make a request under the Freedom of Information Act.

I would be grateful if you could let me know which charities received funding from the Home Office and its agencies:

- In 2008; and
- In 2007.

Yours sincerely,

Paul Brennan


Let's see if the cunts respond with some answers, or dodgy excuses... Not holding my breath...

PS I see the Devil is talking about the alcohol 'limits' which some 'scientists' invented in the 1980s, and which Government uses 'charities' - and dumbass 'liberal' democrat MPs - to promote. Did you know that they also made up '5 a day' - apparently, it's actually 3 a day.

Update: All Depts have promised to respond within 20 days, other than HM Treasury...

Sunday, 18 January 2009

Tim Ireland - Necessary Evil or Just a Knob?

I guess I am not the first to blog about this... and I'm sure I won't be the last :-(

I have had the unfortunate 'pleasure' of reading comments from Tim Ireland on various blogs over the last week, having only heard about him second-hand via Guido and Iain Dale.

My instinctive reaction, as I put it on Recess Monkey, was to tell him to get a life. And his response was martyrdom!

And I see he is being his usual irritating self on - self-appointed fount of righteousness in the blogosphere that he is.

The guy is clearly a knob... and yet I am inclined to believe that there is a place for all, even for the most nakedly self-righteous, in all of our 'occasional' blogrolls. Even though Guido is clearly a million miles from the level of power exercised by Rupert Murdoch, we should always think about the underlying interests of all those whose opinions we read, because they can all have an influence over our developing views. Well, obviously with the exception of the genuinely stupid and self-serving (Polly Toynbee springs to mind, as the Devil illustrates nicely in his latest post).

But... Tim - and I mean this in the nicest way - could you at least try to be a little less pompous and self-satisfied in the way that you perform your important social function? After all, we all have to eat fibre - but it can be in the form of tastier fare like rye bread rather than the cardboard taste of bran flakes (and you can even put sugar on those!).

Labour get fisted!

I see that have taken on the pisspoor and taken Mandy's statement about engaging openly rather too literally for Mandy's liking.

Comment of the day so far....

    • Paul says:

      As my comment on this post was deleted on LabourList, I thought I should post it here…

      Mandy, can you tell us the name of the young man you were spotted with in Marrakech?

  1. Lord Mandelson, what do you think of your early adventures in Second Life, brought to an eager audience courtesy of the Daily Mail?

    And do you really have that tattoo?

    • A small Arab boy says:

      مصرع طفلين في قصف على مدرسة للأونروا بقطاع غزة، وجرح تسعة جنود إسرائيليين داخل القطاع.


Well, it made me laugh....

Monday, 12 January 2009

Oh. My. God.

As you probably know, the Devil already has a blog. But, in that case, it's clearly not the Devil in the evil - Satanic, Beelzebub - sense

Now, however - via one of DK's Anonymous disciples - it seems that Satan - the real one - has learned the art of seeking to spread his poison online.

Some of you may remember Rory Bremner's avatar of Peter Mandelson on his C4 show (well, C4 has to be useful for something...). I thought it was funny.

Now I'm not so sure...

Is nowhere safe from these bastards?

Citizens of Second Life - prepare yourselves for:
  • Eye-watering levels of virtual taxation and government debt
  • Monitoring of all your online activities.
  • Harriet Harman stopping any sexual fantasies (unless they involve ugly women only)
  • Virtual imprisonment / hanging for smoking or speeding offences; rewards for committing anything previously regarded as criminal
  • 'Losing' your data so that it can be used by criminals
  • A financial crisis that 'began in America' but hits the UK worse than anywhere else, for reasons that can't be explained, other than by some vague reference to potential other governments being 'do-nothing' organisations
  • Gulags for anyone that doesn't repeat, parrot-style, everything that the Mandelson avatar says
  • A Second Life Broadcasting Corporation - funded by compulsory taxation - which features such 'balanced' reporters as 'Toilets' Macguire and 'Toenails' Robinson
  • Free inside information for a Robert Peston avatar
  • All-in-all, a virtual USSR - a model for the UK if Labour win the next election.
Is it possible to have a virtual revolution? Are there any Second-Lifers who would volunteer to lead it - and treat the Mandelson avatar to Bolshevik-style retribution?

Please, God - what did we do? :-(

The bishop is back... and angry as ever!

Dear Reader

Apologies for the absence of posts recently - I've been enjoying a (well-earned?) holiday.

I gather that I'm not the only one... Mandy Pandy has apparently been spotted in Marrakech (incidentally, not his first time there...). Some of Guido's co-conspirators have even suggested that he might have been enjoying some of the, ahem, adult entertainment that Marrakech offers.

Well, clearly the Bishop isn't in a position to judge the truth of the matter - nor, as a libertarian, does he care if Mandy or anyone else indulges in such activities, provided they involve consenting adults. But, if this was what Mandy was doing, and given Harriet Harperson's Jacqui Smith's new law which will insist that clients check prostitutes' ages and that they aren't trafficked, perhaps Mandy could let us know whether he took similar precautions in North Africa, and how he ensured that he was told the truth?

Or, as anyone outside the Labour Party knows, will the legislation not work? There was an excellent article by Hannah Fletcher and Claudia Fromme in the Times on this, back in November. In particular, it points to experience in Finland, where, 'Since [similar] legislation came into effect, there has not been one single prosecution', because it is impossible to prove 'beyond reasonable doubt' that a client knew that a prostitute was trafficked.

Perhaps this is all part of Labour's ongoing attempts to turn England into a police state? The failure of the legislation will mean that 'beyond reasonable doubt', the backbone of a fair and just legal system for centuries, will be changed - no doubt, to 'if you support Labour, you're a victim and we'll pay you vast amounts of taxpayers' money, and, if not, you're an evil criminal who doesn't understand social justice, and we'll send you to the gulag'.

Perhaps the Prime Mentalist is more like Stalin than Mr Bean, after all?

Getting back to the subject in hand, I think it is worth reflecting on some of what the article says in detail...

When Richard Gere picked up Julia Roberts in his Lotus Esprit in Pretty Woman, it was the start of a great Hollywood romance. The classic prostitute with a heart of gold, she was transformed almost instantly into a glamous sex kitten, equally at home shopping on Rodeo Drive, decorating his arm at the opera in San Francisco or stamping the divots at a polo match. And, of course, there was a fairytale ending in which the corporate prince rescued the fair maiden as she promised to “rescue him right back”.

But if an English Gere — perhaps a hedge-fund manager trying to find Notting Hill in the dark — attempted a similar stunt in the brave new world of Jacqui Smith, the Home Secretary, he wouldn't be handing out strawberries in the hotel penthouse but having his mugshot taken at the nearest police station.

Well, yeah. I mean, does anyone seriously think that prostitution is glamorous? Pretty Woman is a shit film, and hardly compares to reality (for a start, Richard Gere [edited for legal purposes! ;-)]). Seriously... (I guess they had to do this, as such sensationalisation seems to be a requirment even for broadsheet journalists these days... But forgive them - the rest of the article is unusually balanced and fair).

Andy Hayman, former assistant commissioner of the Metropolitan Police, thinks that the new proposals are ludicrous. “The police have so many other priorities, such as knife crime,” he says. “They don't want to hound prostitutes who obviously need the money, or their clients, unless they are causing serious problems.

“What these women need is help. Many of them are drug addicts or behind with their rent; they already have criminal convictions so they can't find another job. They don't need to be forced farther underground. Most are already very co-operative, and they are great informers. Coppers will ignore this one.”

Wow! The police being sensible? Perhaps Inspector Gadget despairs too much? Although it is an ex-copper talking... And they probably should go after the people traffickers....

"This is an disaster for many working women,” says Virginia (not her real name), who works in a sex parlour in southeast England that is run by a middle-aged couple. “These measures will make our jobs far more dangerous. The couple I work for are not pimps, they check my clients and make sure I'm safe. The sex between my client and myself is a consensual act.”

Nicky Adams, a spokeswoman (NB not 'spokesperson' - naughty, naughty!) for the English Collective of Prostitutes (NB note that 'union' seems to be a dirty word here - perhaps this explains Labour's hatred for them?), adds:

...prostitutes are now terrified of ending up with the most unscrupulous pimps. “All this will do is hound the decent parlour owners. The Government is trying to take the moral high ground but it's a low blow for women who are struggling to make ends meet, whether they are from Croydon or Croatia.”

But, as Harperson argues, isn't prostitution just, well, wrong? If women demean themselves by being prostitutes, why should we want them to be protected? After all, if we can get murder and rape figures up, then we can put all men (the raping bastards!) in prison and have a much better world! And we don't want any pretty Eastern European women here, showing how ugly many British women are! After all, how's a girl to get a girlfriend against that sort of competition?

If only women would simply look and dress like Harriet or our dear Jacqui (especially in her knife-proof vest, and with her protection squad, vital for any Labour Minister given what they've done to this country), then no man would want to fuck them! And then there would be no prostitution.

Except for rent boys in Marrakech, accessible only to senior Labour Ministers. Nothing wrong with that - after all, gay and Labour, now that's a minority group that deserves the full protection of the law...