NHS to offer new 'Polly Pill'

Prime Minister Gordon Brown announced today that the new Polly Pill, revealed 'exclusively' on the Al-Jabeeba website this week, will be made available immediately on the NHS, on a compulsory basis, to all voters citizens, despite concerns about side-effects.

The Chancellor One-eyed Scottish cunt Prime Minister said, 'Ve have been looking for vays of making you pork, I mean, we have been looking for ways to neutralise opposition and ensure the re-election of a National Socialist Labour government, and this is perfect. It will not benefit hard-working families throughout the Socialist Republic of Scotland the UK.

Named after legendary Guardian columnist Polly Toynbee, once the new Polly Pill has been taken, the patient immediately begins to spout left-wing bollocks reasonable, 'liberal' views, and will immediately believe everything that Gordon Brown says, including the delusion obvious point that he is the Saviour of the World, John the Baptist to Barack Obama's Jesus.

Concerns about side-effects - including allegations of the development of SHS (Severe Hypocrisy Syndrome), usually involving earning large sums of money for writing bollocks whilst pretending to represent 'the poor', and taking regular flights to a second home abroad whilst condemning those who fly abroad for their one holiday a year for causing global warming - have been dismissed by those close to the Prime Minister, who point out that the Polly Pill is believed to reduce the incidence of Conservative voting by as much as 50%, and that, therefore, the benefits hugely outweigh any risks.

Nuts!

Old Holborn has drawn this fat bitch to my attention.

This isn't the first time I've heard a black person refer to another as a 'coconut' - it's usually reserved for people who aspire to middle-class things, like a house in a good area, a good education for their kids, etc.

Demonstrating ignorance beyond belief.

Well, OH's respondents have said most of it. But I would draw out 2 points:

- Why is it acceptable for black people to be racist - attacking values, etc. that are apparently 'white'? Why the double standards? Anyone? Draper? Harperson? Our friends at the BBC?
- I thought national politicians were stupid, but this one takes the biscuit. How do we devolve powers to local government with this shower of shite in line to wield them?

Wanker of the Week

Is the improbably named 'James T Kirk', for the following comment on the BBC News' Have Your Say:

"In their 2005 manifesto New labour promised a referendum on whether or not to sign the Lisbon treaty."

No, it was on the EU constitution, not the Lisbon Treaty. Irrespective of that, Blair did that to ensure the French held a referendum which he believed (rightly) would reject the Constitution and enable Britain and other countries to renegotiate some of the more ambitious aspects and gain more opt outs. This was achieved with the result that Lisbon really is just a tidying up exercise.

Well, as much as I like Star Trek (alright, alright, stop sniggering at the back... :-), this 'James T Kirk' is an utter wanker. I mean, does anyone seriously buy this shit? Gordon 'Courage' Brown didn't hold a referendum because he was scared that he would lose. As the Meerkat says, 'Simples'...

Meanwhile, most (though not all) of those making comments show their general ignorance by attacking Free Trade. My favourite is this:

We need a bit of both [Free Trade and Protectionism!]. Exporting comes from reciprocity [NB A protectionist concept, much favoured by the French...], and we need to keep key domestic skills safe.

BUT the net result should be that we export a little more than we import.

Eventually that WILL solve our economic woes.

You just can't be a net importer and fund it by debt...as we have seen.

Gordon-Charisma Brown, Brownutopia, Republic of Tax, Spend and Waste.

As much as this person has obviously picked out Gordon the Moron's, ahem, 'qualities', the statement does suggest one slight mathematical problem: how can all countries export a little more than they import?!!! That means that we can't all follow this policy, which makes it unsustainable... that way lies the 1930s Depression, to which protectionism made no little contribution.

What these muppets need to get is some basic economics (and history) lessons:

- Some countries import more than they export. This deficit can be funded in a number of ways: borrowing, a transfer / sale of assets abroad / etc.

- This is not a problem! It's a good thing!

- If a country can no longer afford - or is perceived as no longer being able to afford - to do this, its currency tends to depreciate against those of others. This makes its imports more expensive, and its exports cheaper, allowing it to reduce / eliminate its trade deficit. [For the benefit of the likes of Mr Kirk, this is one reason why joining the Euro is a really dumb idea - just look at its impact on Italy, for example...]

- This is a natural part of the economic cycle... like recessions. You can't 'cure' a recession, as idiots like Brown seem to think. Of course, you can make them worse, by entering them with a structural fiscal deficit, built up during a boom... But who would be stupid enough to do something like that?!

Is it just me...

This story in today's Guardian (no, I don't normally read it: the Devil linked to a different story and I saw the headline) has opened my eyes to a bizarre 'pastime', called 'Upskirting'. This apparently involves the illicit taking of photographs up the skirts of oblivious females...

What the fuck?!

Just how low can people sink? I thought we'd reached a nadir with Big Brother and Benicio del Toro's 'Che', but...

One view might be that the legalisation of prostitution can't come soon enough. Another - that these men are too cowardly (or too small down there) to ever try to have sex with a woman, even if they were paying for it...

However, it does have the upside of getting Guardian readers all in a tizz - the comments are well worth reading, if only to see the stupidity of that particular group... And the Islamist tossers who suggest that 'women should dress appropriately'. Which takes me back to the Devil's post about how 30% of the population still, apparently, plan to vote Labour.

Lord help us.

Nutter on the bus...

'Fuckin kids, nah fuckin respect these days. Me, I got a dodgy knee, and that scum we've brought into the world won't give me a seat. Kids these days - they're just scum. Just stabbing kids, no good for anyfink. Going into hospital tomorruh, only waiting til tomorruh so I can get my pension. And they won't give me a seat'

Says the nutter to his reflection in the window, as he climbs up onto the top deck of the thing they call a bus here in Chav-ville.

So far, not a lot to disagree with.

'Can't believe the mess this country's in. We're going to the bloody dogs.'

How true.

'It's all the fault of that one-eyed Scotch cunt. He should go back to fuckin' Scotland. He's finished, finished.'

If only. If only.

'Let the banks fail. Why the fuck should bloody taxpayers bail out the fucking banks? Somefink else would've evolved to take their place.'

True, how true.

'This place is full of bloody Europeans, half of 'em don't even speak fuckin' English.'

Mmmmm. Well, I don't hold it against you.

'All that cunt Gordon Brown's fault. He's let 'em in.'

Fair point. But they (and the, ahem, people of colour you don't appear to like very much) are, for the most part, a damn sight more useful than the native inhabitants of Chav-ville. Perhaps we could send the chavs to their countries?

'But I won't vote for the bleedin' Tories, me. No way.'

Well, it's true that they won't be much better (not that they could be any worse, of course).

'Nah, the answer's National Socialism', he emphasises, 'National Socialism'.

Oh dear.... and I thought we might be friends. Well, alright, maybe not... but I did at least feel sorry for you.

'Yer, vote BNP. Vote BNP, that's what I'm gonna do. This country's goin' to the dogs.'

How instructive for the twats at Liberal Conspiracy, who keep trying to claim that National Socialism had nothing to do with socialism. Clearly, not something that all of their fellow 'liberals' share... Something for them to ponder - if only they dared read anything outside their own comfort zone...