Forgive me for writing to you twice - I felt that it was important to write to you at both of your addresses, as it is not clear to me which is your main residence.
Following the recent decision to bar Geert Wilders from the UK, I felt it necessary to warn you of the risks of creating disturbances in other communities of certain Government actions. Clearly, on receipt of this information, you will feel compelled to act, as you have done following Lord Ahmed's intervention in the Wilders case.
First, any decision to allow any Muslim preacher into the UK will result in a delegation of at least 10,000 Christians, Hindus, Jews, agnostics, atheists and Jedi marching on whichever of your addresses you are at at the time. I therefore respectfully request that you do not allow any Muslim preachers into the UK.
Second, any decision of Gordon Brown not to resign and call an immediate election will result in the same delegation marching on Downing St. Again, I therefore respectfully suggest that the Prime Mentalist resign forthwith, with a general election to follow immediately.
Third, any decision not to tell the European Court of Human 'Rights' to go forth and multiply over the case of Abu Qatada, and a failure to deport him immediately will result in the same delegation marching on the prison where he is being held and holding an impromptu hanging, with similar sized delegations (for similar purposes) marching on the Home Office and both of your residences.
Fourth, failure to prosecute members of the Labour Party for outright fraud (most notably yourself, the Cooper-Balls household, Ken Livingstone, Lee Jasper, members of the House of Lords who have been taking bribes in return for amending laws - in fact, the list seems to be endless) will result in a similar delegation marching on Parliament.
PS I have just been told that the right to march on Parliament and break the law is one that is reserved solely for Muslims, with additional rights reserved for those who have killed someone by reading / sending text messages whilst driving. Apologies for my error in believing that all UK citizens were equal before the law.