'Fuckin kids, nah fuckin respect these days. Me, I got a dodgy knee, and that scum we've brought into the world won't give me a seat. Kids these days - they're just scum. Just stabbing kids, no good for anyfink. Going into hospital tomorruh, only waiting til tomorruh so I can get my pension. And they won't give me a seat'
Says the nutter to his reflection in the window, as he climbs up onto the top deck of the thing they call a bus here in Chav-ville.
So far, not a lot to disagree with.
'Can't believe the mess this country's in. We're going to the bloody dogs.'
How true.
'It's all the fault of that one-eyed Scotch cunt. He should go back to fuckin' Scotland. He's finished, finished.'
If only. If only.
'Let the banks fail. Why the fuck should bloody taxpayers bail out the fucking banks? Somefink else would've evolved to take their place.'
True, how true.
'This place is full of bloody Europeans, half of 'em don't even speak fuckin' English.'
Mmmmm. Well, I don't hold it against you.
'All that cunt Gordon Brown's fault. He's let 'em in.'
Fair point. But they (and the, ahem, people of colour you don't appear to like very much) are, for the most part, a damn sight more useful than the native inhabitants of Chav-ville. Perhaps we could send the chavs to their countries?
'But I won't vote for the bleedin' Tories, me. No way.'
Well, it's true that they won't be much better (not that they could be any worse, of course).
'Nah, the answer's National Socialism', he emphasises, 'National Socialism'.
Oh dear.... and I thought we might be friends. Well, alright, maybe not... but I did at least feel sorry for you.
'Yer, vote BNP. Vote BNP, that's what I'm gonna do. This country's goin' to the dogs.'
How instructive for the twats at Liberal Conspiracy, who keep trying to claim that National Socialism had nothing to do with socialism. Clearly, not something that all of their fellow 'liberals' share... Something for them to ponder - if only they dared read anything outside their own comfort zone...
Monday, 16 February 2009
Sunday, 15 February 2009
Modern English usage, part viii (cont)
The Derek Draper nonsense this week has reminded me of just how, ahem, 'far' the language of Milton and Shakespeare has come in just 11 years of the Moron, Harperson, et al.
Anyway, I thought it might be important to start to record these momentous changes for posterity:
'Racist' - Anyone who disagrees with a socialist.
'Liberal' - A socialist, usually self-important, with the Guardian rolled up and stuffed up her ass (NB note the avoidance of any assumption that the Liberal is male).
'A good service' - The usual crappy level of service offered by the London Undergroud.
'Hard-working families' - Chavs who vote Labour (assuming they are allowed to vote; sadly, many 13-15 year olds are disenfranchised, something that the Party must sort out as soon as possible). Usually used to support the idea that anyone who is single cannot possibly work hard, and therefore must pay what used to be regarded (laughably, of course) as penal levels of taxation.
'White, anglo-saxon male' - repressor; bastard; value-less, someone that a Muslim (qv) may kill without punishment.
'White, anglo-saxon female' - object of the repression and bastardry meted out by the white anglo-saxon male (qv). Nonetheless, may be used for the sexual gratification of a Muslim without punishment.
'Tory' - Evil, must be stopped from gaining power at all costs, even if it means abandoning any pretence at democracy in the UK.
'School' - place where children from poor backgrounds must be pandered to at all costs, as part of the wider reach of the State. Anyone who suggests that school should be a place of learning a) has clearly not been near one in 20 years, and b) should be locked up, given their potential to harm themselves and Society (NB there is such a thing as Society, and it can be personalised, so can think, feel, be harmed, etc.).
'Social worker' - a state employee who should be given even more power, despite all the evidence that they should have very limited powers (Baby Peter, etc.).
'Muslim' - a member of society who has more rights than other people, including the right not to be offended; should this right be breached, Muslims have the right to call for the death of the person causing the offence, to blockade Parliament and, ultimately, to take over the country.
'The NHS' - the official religion of the UK, the only thing held in higher esteem than Islam. No-one may criticise the NHS or suggest that it is a waste of money; punishment is to be told that 'you obviously support the US health system, where 40m people don't have any healthcare, you eeeeeevil Tory (qv), you'. And to be sent to a re-education camp.
'Politician' - cunt (common usage, punishable by death); a selfless public servant, provided that they are a liberal (qv). If a Tory, then common usage applies (without threat of death).
'MP' - person entitled to enrich themselves at the expense of taxpayers; not to be held to account for any expense claims or to have applied to them standards that are usual for mere mortals.
'Minister' - like MP, except even less accountable. Not to be questioned under any circumstances.
'America' - the source of all things bad. Though no longer, now that George W Bush has departed, to be replaced by Barack Obama (qv).
'Depression' - a word that the Prime Minister only ever uses by accident.
'Barack Obama' - the Messiah, who will save us all, banish poverty, solve the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, bring world peace and usher in a Golden Age, the like of which has never been seen before.
'Gordon Brown' - the Messiah, who has already saved the world; John the Baptist to Obama's Jesus.
'Courage' - disappearing whenever a problem arises; blaming others when this is not possible.
'Tony Blair' - formerly thought to be the Messiah, now shown to simply have been 'a very naughty boy'.
'Grammar' - a device used by the eeeevil middle- and upper-classes to repress the working masses; used to describe schools which took the brightest working class children and co-opted them into the System.
'Politically impartial' - Allowed to occasionally criticise the Labour Party, provided this is counter-balanced by a worse example on the part of the Tories (qv).
'Criminal' - Any member of the middle classes who drives above the speed limit. No longer applies to anyone who was brought up by a single parent / in a 'low-income' (qv) family / from an ethnic minority / etc. who commits murder / rape / theft / etc. They cannot be criminals because it is not their fault that they do these things, but the fault of the System.
'Low-income' - anyone whose income is less than £100,000 a year, unless they come from a middle-class family with two heterosexual parents who love each other.
I'm sure you have many more - perhaps we ought to start a New New Labour dictionary website?
Anyway, I thought it might be important to start to record these momentous changes for posterity:
'Racist' - Anyone who disagrees with a socialist.
'Liberal' - A socialist, usually self-important, with the Guardian rolled up and stuffed up her ass (NB note the avoidance of any assumption that the Liberal is male).
'A good service' - The usual crappy level of service offered by the London Undergroud.
'Hard-working families' - Chavs who vote Labour (assuming they are allowed to vote; sadly, many 13-15 year olds are disenfranchised, something that the Party must sort out as soon as possible). Usually used to support the idea that anyone who is single cannot possibly work hard, and therefore must pay what used to be regarded (laughably, of course) as penal levels of taxation.
'White, anglo-saxon male' - repressor; bastard; value-less, someone that a Muslim (qv) may kill without punishment.
'White, anglo-saxon female' - object of the repression and bastardry meted out by the white anglo-saxon male (qv). Nonetheless, may be used for the sexual gratification of a Muslim without punishment.
'Tory' - Evil, must be stopped from gaining power at all costs, even if it means abandoning any pretence at democracy in the UK.
'School' - place where children from poor backgrounds must be pandered to at all costs, as part of the wider reach of the State. Anyone who suggests that school should be a place of learning a) has clearly not been near one in 20 years, and b) should be locked up, given their potential to harm themselves and Society (NB there is such a thing as Society, and it can be personalised, so can think, feel, be harmed, etc.).
'Social worker' - a state employee who should be given even more power, despite all the evidence that they should have very limited powers (Baby Peter, etc.).
'Muslim' - a member of society who has more rights than other people, including the right not to be offended; should this right be breached, Muslims have the right to call for the death of the person causing the offence, to blockade Parliament and, ultimately, to take over the country.
'The NHS' - the official religion of the UK, the only thing held in higher esteem than Islam. No-one may criticise the NHS or suggest that it is a waste of money; punishment is to be told that 'you obviously support the US health system, where 40m people don't have any healthcare, you eeeeeevil Tory (qv), you'. And to be sent to a re-education camp.
'Politician' - cunt (common usage, punishable by death); a selfless public servant, provided that they are a liberal (qv). If a Tory, then common usage applies (without threat of death).
'MP' - person entitled to enrich themselves at the expense of taxpayers; not to be held to account for any expense claims or to have applied to them standards that are usual for mere mortals.
'Minister' - like MP, except even less accountable. Not to be questioned under any circumstances.
'America' - the source of all things bad. Though no longer, now that George W Bush has departed, to be replaced by Barack Obama (qv).
'Depression' - a word that the Prime Minister only ever uses by accident.
'Barack Obama' - the Messiah, who will save us all, banish poverty, solve the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, bring world peace and usher in a Golden Age, the like of which has never been seen before.
'Gordon Brown' - the Messiah, who has already saved the world; John the Baptist to Obama's Jesus.
'Courage' - disappearing whenever a problem arises; blaming others when this is not possible.
'Tony Blair' - formerly thought to be the Messiah, now shown to simply have been 'a very naughty boy'.
'Grammar' - a device used by the eeeevil middle- and upper-classes to repress the working masses; used to describe schools which took the brightest working class children and co-opted them into the System.
'Politically impartial' - Allowed to occasionally criticise the Labour Party, provided this is counter-balanced by a worse example on the part of the Tories (qv).
'Criminal' - Any member of the middle classes who drives above the speed limit. No longer applies to anyone who was brought up by a single parent / in a 'low-income' (qv) family / from an ethnic minority / etc. who commits murder / rape / theft / etc. They cannot be criminals because it is not their fault that they do these things, but the fault of the System.
'Low-income' - anyone whose income is less than £100,000 a year, unless they come from a middle-class family with two heterosexual parents who love each other.
I'm sure you have many more - perhaps we ought to start a New New Labour dictionary website?
And it begins to sink in...
just how far Labour have fucked us...
Will the last non-chav turn out the lights on their way out, please?
What will all the benefit scum do when we've left them behind? :-)
Will the last non-chav turn out the lights on their way out, please?
What will all the benefit scum do when we've left them behind? :-)
Saturday, 14 February 2009
Wanker of the Week
Back by popular demand...
And today's wanker is... Derek Draper.
Primarily for this post. Presumably, 'revenge' for Guido pointing out that he didn't go to Berkeley (even though it would have been an appropriate place for him...).
Derek - fuck off you tedious, totalitarian cunt. None of the comments you cite are racist - they simply reflect reality in Brown's Britain. But, of course, socialists have always shouted, 'Racist!' at anyone with whom they disagree.
But racist comments like 'British jobs for British workers' are, of course, OK if they are uttered by socialist cunts like Gordon the Moron.
Anyway, given that Guido has apparently deleted the non-racist comments, I'm more than happy for any reader to leave similar ones on this blog. As a reminder, this is the picture:
And, Derek, keep your totalitarian shit on LabourShite - there's no room for it in the rest of the blogosphere.
Honestly, you'd think he had better things to worry about, like his mental boss, who's taking the country down the toilet - or just shagging his wife (after all, we all know the risks of not keeping your spouse happy in bed...).
And today's wanker is... Derek Draper.
Primarily for this post. Presumably, 'revenge' for Guido pointing out that he didn't go to Berkeley (even though it would have been an appropriate place for him...).
Derek - fuck off you tedious, totalitarian cunt. None of the comments you cite are racist - they simply reflect reality in Brown's Britain. But, of course, socialists have always shouted, 'Racist!' at anyone with whom they disagree.
But racist comments like 'British jobs for British workers' are, of course, OK if they are uttered by socialist cunts like Gordon the Moron.
Anyway, given that Guido has apparently deleted the non-racist comments, I'm more than happy for any reader to leave similar ones on this blog. As a reminder, this is the picture:
And, Derek, keep your totalitarian shit on LabourShite - there's no room for it in the rest of the blogosphere.
Honestly, you'd think he had better things to worry about, like his mental boss, who's taking the country down the toilet - or just shagging his wife (after all, we all know the risks of not keeping your spouse happy in bed...).
Monday, 9 February 2009
Comment of the week - April 2008...
Dear Reader,
Apologies for the non-existent blogging - the Angel of Pestilence has been visiting the Brennan household. Only my hamster died, so it's not so bad (although R****** G*** is a bit upset, especially as F****** S*** ate it...).
Anyway, gave me a chance to visit an old friend, aka the Beast. Although he hasn't posted recently (other than on Guido's comments, I was revisiting a classic sick / funny post about the disabled. Personally, I think it's a sign of civilisation when we support the disabled to be productive members of society. But I have to agree with Leg-Iron for this comment, which I think is self-explanatory - and deserves a wider airing:
His posts on Old Holborn aren't bad either...
Apologies for the non-existent blogging - the Angel of Pestilence has been visiting the Brennan household. Only my hamster died, so it's not so bad (although R****** G*** is a bit upset, especially as F****** S*** ate it...).
Anyway, gave me a chance to visit an old friend, aka the Beast. Although he hasn't posted recently (other than on Guido's comments, I was revisiting a classic sick / funny post about the disabled. Personally, I think it's a sign of civilisation when we support the disabled to be productive members of society. But I have to agree with Leg-Iron for this comment, which I think is self-explanatory - and deserves a wider airing:
Most of the disabled are only helpless because people tell them they're helpless. There is a big difference, never stated because it's not PC, between 'disabled' and 'useless'.
To any of those who say 'Oh, I'm disabled, you must feel sorry for me and look after me for the rest of my days because I'm unable to do anything for myself', I have one name to drop.
Stephen Hawking.
He's the most severely disabled person I've ever seen, and he's also the most brilliant scientist in the country. No benefit-scrounging for this guy, he makes all the money he needs through his own efforts.
If you're happy to sit back and live off benefits for the rest of your life, it's not because you're disabled.
It's because you're useless. Wallowing in self-pity is not a viable career choice.
I blame the PC crowd. They love to make people feel dependent. Gives them a steady stream of saps to partonise.
His posts on Old Holborn aren't bad either...
Monday, 2 February 2009
Ride the buses...
Well, I would if they could cope with a bit of snow...
Anyway, I'm bored, being stuck at home and all, and DK has found a bus slogan generator... As my mind is always in the sewer, I came up with this...
Ridicule is always mightier than the sword...
Anyway, I'm bored, being stuck at home and all, and DK has found a bus slogan generator... As my mind is always in the sewer, I came up with this...
Ridicule is always mightier than the sword...
Sunday, 1 February 2009
The rise of the pleblic*
*Term coined by The Filthy Smoker, commenting on Devil's Kitchen.
Well, the signs have been there for some time... England's white, 'working' classes are rising up in support of 'British jobs for British workers'.
And, whilst Mandy Pandy tries to stand up for Free Trade and against protectionism (as, to be fair, he did in Brussels, pissing off the French - well, the man can't be all bad!), the reality is that it is his party, the Prime Mentalist that he is supporting, the economic policy which he has supported all along, the EU policy which he has helped implement as well as supported, the adoption of an effective open border policy to immigrants and the rejection of policies to reduce the power of trade unions that are responsible for the rising tide of union action that we're seeing now.
Frank Field - one of the few Labour MPs that I have any time for - writes today about the consequences of the open doors policy in particular - and the stupidity of the 'British jobs for British workers' soundbite that the Great Gobshite in Downing St used a few months ago. Whilst the article is flawed - not least in its call for Splash Gordon to actually adopt a position of British jobs for British workers - it shows the sheer alarm in the Labour Party about the loss of their core supporters and the concommitant rise of the BNP - Labour voters are switching to them, illustrating that they are a left-wing party, not a right-wing one, no matter what idiots on Liberal Conspiracy try to claim...
But is it the 'white, working class' who should be angry - or those of us who have seen our taxes pissed down the toilet (strange and incongruous, I know, given this week's stories that suggest that Gordo can't actually manage to get to the toilet...) by this useless, ideologically-driven Government? Note - they're not just incompetent. They are deliberately fucking our country up.
One example: schools. Because they can't even get schools to teach our kids to read, write and count, they've given up. Instead, schools are to become a core part of 'children's services' policies to tackle 'inequality' - not, as Grammar schools used to, by teaching them useful skills and knowledge, but by telling them that it's not their fault if they don't learn... even if it's because they're fucking lazy bastards. Don't believe me? Have a look at 21st Century Schools: A World-Class Education for Every Child / A School Report Card. It simply beggars belief.
And some people actually thought Brown would be better than Blair. Although, to be fair (and to borrow a phrase), this isn't Brown, it's Balls.
Not enough for you? How about this from Thursday's Times:
Now, how the fuck, after a boom lasting 15 years or so, are there 4.5 million people on the waiting list for social housing?! Are there that many useless Brits? Probably... Or is it that we have imported 4.5 million people from Poland, Ukraine, Brazil, Pakistan, Nigeria, etc. - well, they all seem to live near me, in my rapidly-depreciating tiny flat in Chav-ville. But weren't we told that these people were generating an economic benefit? So it 'can't' be them!
And what about our wonderfully generous benefits system - generous, that is, to frauds, cheats, liars and other scumbugs (strange that this also fits the description of most members of Parliament...), but not if you are old and need social care, having paid taxes for others' care throughout your working life. Or you've become unemployed in your 50s, after paying taxes all your working life. Just have a look at Ms Snuffy's, errr, heart-warming modern day story about a benefits scam, albeit one perpetrated by an Indian family, rather than by white trash.
So, I ask. What have the striking twats got to strike about?
- They largely voted for this Government of all the Gobshites - or at least funded it, given their membership of Trade Unions like Unite.
- It is the middle classes that are paying for them and their families. The 'poor' cheat the benefits system and / or don't earn enough, whilst the truly rich can get around paying tax. The sods in the middle get (financially) fisted by Gay Gordon and his merry band of cunts.
- They've priced themselves out of the labour market by demanding wages and benefits (wages in all but name) which are out of kilter with their productivity.
It is people like me, who've been paying for all this shite - and will pay for it in the future (although I can move abroad and escape) - who should be going on strike and protesting in the street. Not BNP-voting muppets who believed that Gordon the Moron was some kind of economic genius...
Well, the signs have been there for some time... England's white, 'working' classes are rising up in support of 'British jobs for British workers'.
And, whilst Mandy Pandy tries to stand up for Free Trade and against protectionism (as, to be fair, he did in Brussels, pissing off the French - well, the man can't be all bad!), the reality is that it is his party, the Prime Mentalist that he is supporting, the economic policy which he has supported all along, the EU policy which he has helped implement as well as supported, the adoption of an effective open border policy to immigrants and the rejection of policies to reduce the power of trade unions that are responsible for the rising tide of union action that we're seeing now.
Frank Field - one of the few Labour MPs that I have any time for - writes today about the consequences of the open doors policy in particular - and the stupidity of the 'British jobs for British workers' soundbite that the Great Gobshite in Downing St used a few months ago. Whilst the article is flawed - not least in its call for Splash Gordon to actually adopt a position of British jobs for British workers - it shows the sheer alarm in the Labour Party about the loss of their core supporters and the concommitant rise of the BNP - Labour voters are switching to them, illustrating that they are a left-wing party, not a right-wing one, no matter what idiots on Liberal Conspiracy try to claim...
But is it the 'white, working class' who should be angry - or those of us who have seen our taxes pissed down the toilet (strange and incongruous, I know, given this week's stories that suggest that Gordo can't actually manage to get to the toilet...) by this useless, ideologically-driven Government? Note - they're not just incompetent. They are deliberately fucking our country up.
One example: schools. Because they can't even get schools to teach our kids to read, write and count, they've given up. Instead, schools are to become a core part of 'children's services' policies to tackle 'inequality' - not, as Grammar schools used to, by teaching them useful skills and knowledge, but by telling them that it's not their fault if they don't learn... even if it's because they're fucking lazy bastards. Don't believe me? Have a look at 21st Century Schools: A World-Class Education for Every Child / A School Report Card. It simply beggars belief.
And some people actually thought Brown would be better than Blair. Although, to be fair (and to borrow a phrase), this isn't Brown, it's Balls.
Not enough for you? How about this from Thursday's Times:
There have been intense discussions on Labour’s National Executive Committee about how to help the 4.5 million people waiting for social housing and to get the construction industry back to work, The Times has learnt.
Now, how the fuck, after a boom lasting 15 years or so, are there 4.5 million people on the waiting list for social housing?! Are there that many useless Brits? Probably... Or is it that we have imported 4.5 million people from Poland, Ukraine, Brazil, Pakistan, Nigeria, etc. - well, they all seem to live near me, in my rapidly-depreciating tiny flat in Chav-ville. But weren't we told that these people were generating an economic benefit? So it 'can't' be them!
And what about our wonderfully generous benefits system - generous, that is, to frauds, cheats, liars and other scumbugs (strange that this also fits the description of most members of Parliament...), but not if you are old and need social care, having paid taxes for others' care throughout your working life. Or you've become unemployed in your 50s, after paying taxes all your working life. Just have a look at Ms Snuffy's, errr, heart-warming modern day story about a benefits scam, albeit one perpetrated by an Indian family, rather than by white trash.
So, I ask. What have the striking twats got to strike about?
- They largely voted for this Government of all the Gobshites - or at least funded it, given their membership of Trade Unions like Unite.
- It is the middle classes that are paying for them and their families. The 'poor' cheat the benefits system and / or don't earn enough, whilst the truly rich can get around paying tax. The sods in the middle get (financially) fisted by Gay Gordon and his merry band of cunts.
- They've priced themselves out of the labour market by demanding wages and benefits (wages in all but name) which are out of kilter with their productivity.
It is people like me, who've been paying for all this shite - and will pay for it in the future (although I can move abroad and escape) - who should be going on strike and protesting in the street. Not BNP-voting muppets who believed that Gordon the Moron was some kind of economic genius...
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